Better

So far, I feel better today.  I haven't really done anything important, so I'm sure tonight I will be feeling like I wasted another day, but right now, I'm ok.  I snuggled on the couch with Ladybug for a long time, read a bit, and worked on the laundry mountain that never seems to slow down.  LB and I are headed in to tidy up the girls' room when I finish up here.  It's a mess of toys and clothes.  Shouldn't bee too hard to get it straightened up, it just seems like when I send the girls in there to do it by themselves, they make more mess than it started with!  They definitely do better with some guidance and help.  My goal over the next few weeks is to get the other members of this family to start picking up after themselves.  I think that is a lot of my problem.  I spend so much time putting other people's junk away that by the time I'm done doing that, I just want to cry when I see the regular jobs that still need to be taken care of.  Plus, it makes me upset because then I have no time to do something that I'd like to do, like create or read or exercise. 
I'm going to the temple tonight.  I really don't want to go.  I just want to stay home and do nothing, but I'm hoping it will be a good experience. 
Ok, off to clean up!  Hope your day is a great one!!

What's the problem?

I have issues, I know that.  I'll be the first to admit it.  But I just can't get over the feeling that there is something really wrong with me.  I just can't seem to do the things I want/need to do anymore without feeling completely overwhelmed and just usually end up shutting down completely because of the stress of it all.  Nothing I say or do seems to get me any help from my family.  I am tired.  Just really, really tired. Tired of everything.  Tired of trying.  Tired of pretending.  Tired of falling short of what everyone else thinks I should be.  It's really hard to face the mornings, knowing that I will end up feeling worse and worse as I go throughout the day and wishing the hours away until I can climb back in bed and sleep...oblivious to the crud for a few sweet hours.  Why do I feel like this and how do I make it go away?  I just want to feel happy and healthy again. 

Another try?

I've been feeling the need lately for some sort of outlet. I used to do things that I loved, like writing, photography, etc.  Now I feel like we are so busy that I'm lucky if I get a chance to read a bit before bed at night.  I would really like to start taking pictures again.  I've had an itch for the past month or so that makes me want to pick up the camera and spend some time behind the lens again.  I feel like I need to get the house in order before I can really get going on other things, so hopefully I can find the energy to make that happen.  I am also setting a goal to check in here more often.  It's been almost a year!  Yikes!